High Latency
In addition to having an infatuation for water, our new puppy is also blessed with a very special brain. You see, it has a built in “lag factor.” She needn’t be under the influence of mind-altering chemicals (I suppose water will do). There don’t have to be any distractors in the environment.
No, Zamba simply needs time to process. She’s not dumb, persay — she’s learned or partly learned several handy commands in a matter of days. But, stare right her and give her a confident “sit” and you’ll immediately get a Newfie Tongue Hanging Out(TM), a Newfie Blank Stare(TM), a faintly audible whirring (that’s the gears in her brain), and then, finally… yes. She’ll sit.
Okay, I probably got a little hyperbolic with that description. Really, the lag averages only about five seconds. It’s awesome!
I’m afraid Scotts often need that much time to process audio input, as well.
Dad: Gibberishgibberishgibberish. Gibberish?
July 30th, 2008 at 7:26 amMe: What?
[beat]
[beat]
[beat]
[beat]
[beat]
Me: Ohhhhhhhh. Nope.
[beat]
[beat]
[Sudden look of enlightenment on Dad's face as he finally translates "What?" from my gibberish.]
I know what he is thinking…
July 30th, 2008 at 6:58 pm“Why rush….they are gonna feed me, give me plenty of water and treats, comb me a lot…even a steak dinner once a year. All of that and I don’t need to get a summer job…and, once I catch on to this potty training, they will REALLY love me…what a life!